Week 20
2 min readMay 8, 2022
- I moved back to Bangalore this week after a month long stay in Mumbai. The weather has been an absolute relief. While I hate the cold and wet, I’m glad for the drop in temperature for now. But the boots will have to be brought out soon.
- For my birthday I asked my friends to get me an Audible subscription and have been listening to The Anthropocene Reviewed on Viba’s recommendation. It’s an enjoyable and light read, although few of the subjects being reviewed are completely foreign to me (what’s Dr. Pepper?). Regardless, John Green’s writing feels familiar and that’s nice. I’m still not sure how much I like it though, there always seems to be some aspect of really pushing the romanticisation to a level that seems phony to me, or maybe I’m just too much of a cynic.
- Lately I’ve been loathing men with unearned confidence, mostly because I envy them. I’d like one serving of that delusion too, please.
- Related to that, I’ve also been trying to practice radical acceptance. I hate it, but I can see how it’s helping me too. Which makes me hate it a little more, but I’ll eventually come to terms with that.
- I’ve been thinking of what I’m trying to do with these weeknotes — I feel quite awkward talking about myself constantly here, cringe even. But again, this is my space to muse, and it’s not being shoved in anyone’s face. But still, every time I type “I”, it just feels wrong. I just keep reminding myself to not try to minimise myself, and to take up more space, however I’d like to.
- A lot of incredible things have happened as well that should be acknowledged. I’m enjoying my work, and being paid well. After years of worrying whether I’ll get to do the kind of work I’d like to, I think I’ve found my rhythm. I don’t feel like I’m lagging behind anymore, and I’m able to see abundance in opportunities and learning, in place of scarcity. This is huge for me. But it still stings to see just how different everyone’s journeys are. I hate how a company that didn’t respond to my application during my initial job search reached out to me themself a few months into my current job (asking me if I’d be interested in applying for the same job that I actually had already applied to). The disparity in opportunity and access to mentors/great people to work with is just more apparent now, and it suckssssss.
- Ok I’m hungry now.
